Knowing how to approach the grief of others can be difficult, although things can get more complicated when addressing the grief of students in school settings.

Estimates indicate that nearly 7% of children in the U.S. will experience the death of a sibling or parent by the age of 18. Overcoming the cultural taboo around dealing with grief is especially important for teachers and other education personnel.

Gilly Cannon, director of the Children's Bereavement Services at Caring Matters in Gaithersburg, said it's important for educators and families to work together to support a grieving child at school.

"If schools were going to do three things," said Cannon, "they need to show that they care about the students, I want them to show that they can listen deeply without judging, and I'd want them to let the student know that school is a safe place for them to be present in, with their grief."

She said listening without judging involves being able to really hear the other person without needing to share your own experience, or making a judgment about the validity of the other person's feelings.

During these conversations people have to deal with their own impulse to want to fix things for the other person, or put a positive spin on the situation. Cannon recommended against both, and said people should begin by acknowledging what's happened.

"Let them know that you've heard that their person has died, and that you are very sad about that news," said Cannon. "So you're showing them that you are acknowledging it, you're aware of it, what you don't want to then do is to try and make them feel better."

Cannon said she believes that educators need to maintain the institutional awareness of the child's experience of loss, and ensure it travels with them during their school years.

"When a child is grieving," said Cannon, "you need to ensure that as they move from class to class and grade to grade and school to school, that you're passing on that information that this child has had a significant loss, because children revisit their grief as they grow. Their grief morphs and changes as they get older and they have milestones without that person."

Cannon also recommended that people avoid well intentioned clichés such as the idea of the deceased person "being in a better place" or that they wouldn't want to see them cry.

She says these kinds of clichés imply that a grieving person should feel better and hold back their tears, but the message communicated to the grieving person is that their feelings are not valid.

"You don't want to diminish any of their feelings," said Cannon. "You want them to be able to say how they're feeling. And also to know that there's no good or bad feelings, there's feelings. There's no judgment on how they're feeling."

A new annual report shows New York City has more than 146,000 homeless students.

The Advocates for Children of New York report finds this is an increase from last year when more than 119,000 students were homeless. It also finds more than half of students were temporarily sharing housing with others, while 41% lived in shelters.

Jennifer Pringle, director of Project LIT with Advocates for Children of New York, says the city can help these students by addressing transportation delays.

"Roughly 40% of students in shelters are placed in a different borough from where they go to school, which means that students in temporary housing often face long commutes and are disproportionately impacted by busing delays," she said.

Other recommendations include eliminating the 60-day shelter limits and addressing shortages in staff supporting students in temporary housing. But, Pringle notes there's work the state can do too. More than 115 groups want the state to add a weight for students in temporary housing as part of the school funding formula re-evaluation.

The biggest challenge to implement these recommendations is political will, although they have broad support. But, student homelessness has been a long-standing issue for the city. This is the ninth year in a row New York City's homeless student population has included more than 100,000 students. There are many reasons students become homeless.

"Certainly we know there's a growing housing-affordability crisis," she continued. "Families indicate that domestic violence is one leading driver of family homelessness. And then also we have immigrant families, newcomers to the city as well, who are in temporary housing."

Living in temporary housing significantly impacts students' education. The report finds most students in either temporary housing or a shelter were chronically absent. It also notes their English Language Arts proficiency was 20% lower than students in permanent housing.


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This coming Saturday is National Adoption Day, but kids who are older or have special needs face more difficulty in finding adoptive parents.

More than 113,000 children in foster care are eligible for adoption, according to the Department of Health and Human Services - about 4,000 of them are in Maryland.

And more than half entered the foster care system because of neglect.

Saara McEachnie, director of domestic adoption programs at the Barker Adoption Foundation, runs the "Project Wait No Longer" program - focused on finding adoptive homes for older children, groups of siblings and those with other special needs.

She said teens are the most vulnerable.

"Families that are seeking to adopt are most often feeling most comfortable, and most equipped or prepared, to be able to adopt a younger child," said McEachnie. "So, that leaves fewer options for our older kiddos that are very much in need of family, and we have few families that are stepping forward."

McEachnie explained that children sometimes struggle with attachment or bonding after being removed from their birth family and placed with strangers.

She said it's important to educate people who want to become adoptive parents, to better prepare them to adopt older kids.

McEachnie said potential adoptive families can learn to make their homes what she calls "more attachment friendly."

That includes understanding the attachment difficulties that may come from a child's complex trauma.

She said it helps to create networks of fellow adoptive families in order to build a like-minded community for the child.

"Building an attachment-friendly home first has to come from a place of understanding, empathy, flexibility," said McEachnie, "willingness to seek and access resources, willingness to continue to understand the population."

National Adoption Day was first launched in 1999 by a coalition of national groups, including the Children's Action Network and Alliance for Children's Rights.




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New Mexico child welfare groups are behind an initiative they plan to introduce in the next legislative session to create a so-called baby bonds program.

The Partnership for Community Action and other child advocacy groups introduced a pilot program earlier this fall.

Executive Director Nichelle Gilbert said 15 children received trust accounts of $6,000 - available to the child when they turn 18.

"These funds that are invested grow over time," said Gilbert, "and are available to invest in things like education, starting a business, owning a home, or to pursue other opportunities that foster upward mobility."

Proposals for baby bond programs have passed in California, Connecticut, and Washington, DC - and have been introduced at the federal level and in eight additional states.

The New Mexico State Treasurer, who supports baby bonds, recently held a symposium to discuss and develop a bill to be introduced in the 2025 legislative session, that would create a statewide program.

New Mexico has a high rate of poverty and one of the widest income gaps.

Gilbert said if lawmakers approve the concept, eligible children would receive a publicly funded trust account at birth - providing them with a startup fund to pursue a prosperous and directed adult life.

She said she believes the program could help dismantle inequities and reduce barriers to wealth.

"It's encouraging local investment, it's promoting asset building, it's facilitating education and careers," said Gilbert, "and all the while breaking cycles of poverty."

Roughly 28% of New Mexico's children younger than age five and a quarter of those younger than 18 live in poverty - while the national poverty rate is about 11%.

Child advocates unsuccessfully pitched legislation to require a financial literacy course - in high school - but lawmakers made it an elective instead.




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