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NM's schoolchildren, adults could benefit from 'active listening'

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Friday, November 8, 2024   

If the election season made one thing clear, it is neither side can hear what the other is saying and one expert believes it is because most of us were not taught "active listening" in school.

Christine Miles, founder of The Listening Path Classroom program, said only about 2% of schools offer formal listening skill development programs, which can handicap our success as adults. Miles believes too many of us listen half-heartedly, keen to share our thoughts or arguments the minute the other person stops talking.

"This is not new," Miles pointed out. "Since 1957, there's been talk about the fact that there's not formal education in schools on listening, and the reason I think it hasn't been solved is because listening has been notoriously hard."

Research shows students from kindergarten through 12th grade spend 50% to 75% of their classroom time listening, yet comprehend only 25% to 50% of what they hear. According to Miles, when it comes to politics, it is rarely effective to argue someone into adopting your position.

Miles believes technology is partly to blame for poor listening. Kids spend so many hours on their electronic devices, Miles explained some develop a natural form of attention deficit disorder, even if they don't have the condition biochemically.

"What the technology has done is made our brains even more impatient and more distracted than they already were," Miles contended. "If we don't help them learn how to have conversations about things they disagree about, how will they learn how to manage that?"

Miles noted becoming an adult without good listening skills can affect both academic success and social-emotional learning. To develop better skills, experts recommended being fully present in a conversation, showing interest by practicing good eye contact, asking open-ended questions, paraphrasing and reflecting back what has been said and withholding judgment and advice.


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